Don't have a day of lamentation2. Be prepared for your advenutres.
The 3-2-1 Rule
3 HOURS OF SLEEP
2 ACTUAL MEALS
Remember to sleep! Personally, I recommend no fewer than six hours of sleep - eight if you can manage - but I'm a bit biased from being the primary driver on tour; one of the many benefits of being "the straight-edge one." If you're not drunk, sometimes that means you get to drive at 4 AM several nights in a row. Good times!3 So yeah, I recommend more, but if you're looking for an absolute minimum baseline, this'll do.
"But It's Cool If I Just Do Cocaine Instead, Right?"
Beer (or Soda) Doesn't Count
|Man was a legend in many ways.|
On the same note: When you wake up and you’ve got a gig to play but you’re still half drunk and hurtin’ big-time, you’re gonna be dehydrated. The best thing to re-hydrate yourself isn’t Gatorade — it’s Pedialyte, the stuff they give to kids when they’re shitting in their britches! So, get yourself some Pedialyte, get yourself some water and then go for the cheap Mexican food. That’s a survival trick that’ll get you back on the right track.
~ Dimebag Darrel, Guitar World, 2000
While I don't recommend you actually try Dime's method here - my observation indicates that results can vary wildly - the key is to quickly remedy any problems, and try not let yourself get that bad in the first place. Personally, I prefer the Killstring Sports Drink Test, which is a simple barometer.
The Killstring Dehydration Test
Step One: Acquire a sports drink. Gatorade is the classic, I prefer Powerade Zero, but anything that looks like antifreeze and promises nebulous athletic superiority will do the trick.
- Okay - You're probably not dehydrated
- Pretty good - You're headed for trouble
- SERIOUSLY AMAZING - You are dehydrated
Combat Swampy Nether Regions With Superior Alchemy
I like Gold Bond5 myself, but any kind of athletic/baby powder will work. Just make sure that if you're getting the advanced stuff (Gold Bond's green bottle, anything that's used to treat nasty rashes) you know what you're getting into.
CONquer Your Summer With Bad Puns!
ARE NO CAUSE FOR ALARM
1 - Deydration sickness, migraine-like symptoms, nasty indigestion, or just flat-out exhaustion; you name it, it's happened. Lamentation comes in many different forms, and they all suck.
2 - Seriously, don't.
3 - Actually, yeah. Yeah they were. Miss you drunk jerks.
4 - That part comes later!
5 - Yep, that is absolutely an Amazon Affiliate link, because the thought of this blog as a shilling site for NETHER POWDERS is entirely too amusing to me. I hope it trends, and screws up all of my metrics.
NETHER. POWDERS. Gods, I'm like, five years old over here.